Class: Total Body
Studio: Brooklyn Bodyburn
Location: 34 N 6th St, Brooklyn, NY 11249
Workout Category: strength training, pilates, sweat-tastic, no shoes allowed
What ClassPass Says: “Expect 58 minutes of total-body, cardio-infused strength training on our state-of-the-art MegaFormer. This class is perfect for all fitness levels as you will receive modifications and adjustments based on your physical fitness needs. We’ll get your heart pumping while gliding through exercises designed specifically to sculpt and tone your muscles, shred excess fat, strengthen your core, burn calories, improve your balance and challenge your mind and body.”
My Instructor: Devon Kincaid
Class Number: 111
Welp, my ass has never been so sore. For days after my Friday class, the tender reminder of Brooklyn Bodyburn stayed with me every time I tried to cross my legs, sit down, or generally attempt to move below my waist. If Kim Kardashian doesn’t already do this workout, she really needs to.
Only being my second class in this quiet, little known borough, I was looking to shake it up with something uniquely Brooklyn. So when I walked into the studio, I was pleased to see a row of strange, foreign looking machines lined up in front of a long mirror. After checking in with Devon at the front, he noted that it was my first class and said he would give me a quick rundown of the M3S MegaFormer™, the new name for those foreign machines I had just noted. The tutorial was useful and gave me a general sense of the machine, but little did I know how vicious and evil it would become.
We jumped in immediately with a series of ab exercises and when the first drop of sweat rolled off my nose and plopped unceremoniously onto the MegaFormer™ not even 2 minutes into the class, I got nervous. And then everything started shaking and I wanted to cry and I wanted to leave but I was too embarrassed and ohmygod this class was so crazy hard. To get a sense of the various moves, check out this video. By the end of class, we had moved up and down and sideways on the MegaFormer™.
Know that everything will hurt afterwards, but the main areas targeted were our abs, our butt, our biceps, and our hamstrings. More than once, I honestly thought I would fall due to my body shaking so hard (and for half a second I hoped I would just so I could get out of the class). To top off the burning sensations everywhere, was the sense that this class wasn’t particularly fast paced. For me, I do better with a class that’s shaking it up every 40 seconds, moving on to something new, even if it’s moving from one hard exercise to the next hard exercise. For Total Body, the tempo was much slower, more focused, really feeling each push and pull. With this in mind, if you’re anything like me, you will definitely notice the crawling pace of the clock.
At the end of the day, this class is not for somebody new to the fitness scene. I think the Brooklyn Bodyburn website may say it best, though a little too happily: “The Lagree Fitness™ Method is unlike any workout you have ever done – trust us! Expect 55-minutes of calorie-burning (up to 500-800 calories per session), muscle-quivering, shirt-drenching, total-body conditioning. Oh yeah – and sweat. Lots of it.” Like, you may be able to fill a child’s swimming pool with your sweat. But, like any great workout, you cannot deny the benefits of Total Body. This may be one of the best full-body, super-targeted workouts I’ve ever had. Plus, it’s super low impact when you’re looking to take it easy on your joints. Because of the crazy amazing quality of the workout, I’ll probably begrudgingly return. But I won’t like it. I’ll definitely be scared. And I will treat my butt to an ice pack as soon as the class is over. No shame.
Overall Score: 6.25
- Did I Smile (Like…at all): 4
- How Much Did I Sweat It Out: 8
- The Studio Digs: 7
- Teacher, Can We Be Friends?: 6